Truth or Dare
by PierceTheVeils
Summary: Maya, Gumshoe, and Phoenix teach Edgeworth and Franziska how to play Truth or Dare. What could possibly go wrong?


Truth or Dare

"Only foolish fools are known to play this foolish game," Franziska complained, crossing her arms as she took a seat.

"I can't believe neither of you have played before," Maya said, sitting between Edgeworth and Phoenix. "It's a childhood tradition."

"Yeah, sirs! I played Truth or Dare all the time at the police academy!" Gumshoe smiled.

"Our childhood was hardly what you would call 'normal', Miss Fey. Can we just get started? This is not what I was expecting when Wright called us over."

And with that, the game started. To demonstrate how the game worked, they included two practice rounds: Maya asked Phoenix if he had ever failed a class in college, and he admitted that he'd taken civil law procedure twice before receiving a B-minus overall. It was his last class before being eligible for the bar.

Next, Phoenix dared Gumshoe to take his jacket off, as he'd never seen him without it on. After seeing (and smelling) the ridiculously large sweat stains on Gumshoe's shirt, he was promptly asked to put it back on.

"Sorry about that, pal," Gumshoe apologized, scratching the back of his head.

By now, Franziska and Edgeworth understood how the game worked. Franziska in particular was itching to begin.

"Remember, the last person to be asked gets to pick the next person. But they can't pick the person who just asked them. No back and forth." Maya reminded the group.

"Seems simple enough," Edgeworth commented. "I'll go first, if no one else wants to."

"Great, sir!" Gumshoe beamed. "Truth or Dare, Mr. Edgeworth?"

"Truth seems easier. What do you want to know?"

"Where did you go after we all thought you were dead? I was worried sick, pal!"

"Ah. I visited various countries in Europe, comparing and contrasting their legal systems and trying to choose which I should represent. Borgina had the harshest sentences, Allebahst and Babahl had the same system, run by the rich so they can never be caught. They could use an overhaul, but unfortunately I don't have the authority. Germany had no competent defense attorneys and placed far too much value on their 99% conviction rate. I realized that, with all our system's flaws, this country had the fairest, most just courts in the land. And that's why I returned."

"So you visited Borgina, Allebahst, Babahl, and Germany?" Gumshoe asked, puzzled. "Never heard of those cities. Are they close?"

Edgeworth sighed. "I believe it's your turn, Franziska. Would you like truth or dare?"

"Hmph. Is this game that easy to win?" Franziska scoffed. "Fine. I pick... Dare!"

Edgeworth smirked. "I was hoping you'd say that. I dare you to go the whole evening without whipping somebody!"

"Objection! I reject your dare!"

Phoenix shook his head sadly. "Can't do that. It's one of the game's rules."

"Yeah," Maya added, smiling. "If you fail the dare, you lose the game."

Franziska stared at the two, clearly conflicted. Then she threw down her whip. "Fine. I will win this game no matter what!" she turned to Maya. "Truth or dare, Maya Fey?"

"Who, me?" Maya asked, puzzled. "Uh... Dare?"

The German prosecutor smiled, then threw her whip to Maya. "I dare you to whip these foolish males every time they behave in a foolish manner."

"What?!" Phoenix quickly scooted away from Maya.

"That completely defeats the purpose of my dare!"

"Exactly!" Franziska smiled, turning to Maya. "Will you do so, Miss Maya Fey? You cannot forfeit, no?"

Maya shrugged, picking up the leather whip. "I can do this. Hiiiiiiiya!" she whipped Phoenix.

"Ow! Maya, what was that?"

Maya giggled. "Just testing, Nick! Truth or dare, Detective?"

"Um... Truth?"

"Yes! Detective Gumshoe, is it true you went out with Maggey Byrde last week?"

Gumshoe's cheeks flushed, his ears went red, his feet shifted on the office carpet. "Where'd you hear that, pal?"

The spirit medium smiled deviously. "Who cares? Answer the question."

"In front of Mr. Edgeworth?"

"What does my presence have to do with anything?"

"Uh... Well..."

"Stalling is an foolish tactic, Miss Maya Fey. I trust you know what to do."

"Yeooow! Yes, it's true! But it was just coffee, pal! We're meeting again tomorrow!"

"Awwwwwww, that's so sweet!" and with that, she set the whip by her side. "Pearl thinks you two will be Special Someones in no time!"

Maya smiled, clapping her hands together, oblivious to the pain Gumshoe was clearly still in.

"Your turn, Detective Gumshoe," Phoenix reminded, scratching his head.

"Oh right! Truth or dare, Mr. Wright!"

"Um... Truth, I guess."

"Is it true this office is haunted?"

The room was silent for a moment. Finally, Phoenix spoke up. "What?"

"Well, that lady died here last year, right? And she was a spirit medium, too!"

"Yeah, but... Mia's not here anymore." Phoenix ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know what else to tell you, but-"

"But I've seen her ghost, pal! She comes to help out in trials! Where could she come from, if not this office?"

"Detective, there's no such thing as ghosts." Edgeworth replied bitterly. "That was merely her sister trying to fool you."

Maya puffed out her cheeks. "Was not! I actually-"

"Awwwwwww... I remember Mia Fey. I met her when I first became a detective. She seemed really nice."

"Yes, her death was tragic," Edgeworth hand-waved the previous question. "Choose someone, Wright."

Phoenix looked around, trying to pick. His eyes settled on Franziska. "Miss Von Karma. Truth or dare?"

"A foolish man such as you has no right to give me orders. Mr. Phoenix Wright, I choose the option 'truth'."

"Alright then. Tell me. How did you recover from getting shot so quickly?"

Franziska smirked. "Recovery is for losers. I went to the hospital. The staff took the bullet from my shoulder, bandaged the wound, and I was ready to leave," she unconsciously fingered the wound area as she spoke. " I could have prosecuted in court, were it not for those foolish nurses."

"Thank goodness De Killer shot at your whipping arm," Edgeworth commented drily.

"...How is that even possible?!"

Franziska smiled, hand at her hip. "A Von Karma is perfect in every way, Mr Phoenix Wright. Nothing can wound them for long."

Phoenix was stunned.

"...Okay then. Your turn."

Franziska stood, pacing up and down, tapping her chin in consideration. "... Miles Edgeworth. Truth or dare?"

"...truth."

"Very well. Tell me: How did you sneak into the Police Department, upon your return? No one noticed you."

"Simple. I walked in."

"What?"

"I walked in the public entrance and to the Criminal Affairs department. The person manning the entrance was new, and stepped aside when I showed him my prosecutor's badge."

"What? You mean I could just fake a Prosecutor's badge and I'd get inside?" Maya asked, a dangerous glint in her eyes. "This could be useful, Nick."

"Don't even think about it, pal!" Gumshoe ground his teeth. "I'll go to the Chief of Police about this!"

"Who is the new Chief of Police, anyway?" Phoenix wondered. "I haven't met him."

"The Chief I met upon arrival was one Jake Marshall. He had quite an odd way of speaking, and incorrectly addressed me as partner several times. My whip was quick to remedy that situation." Franziska answered, clearly irritated.

"Jake Marshall?! _He_ succeeded Gant?" Phoenix mused, then paused. "Wait, you actually got away with whipping the Chief of Police?"

"No one shows insolence to a Von Karma." Franziska snapped, then pointed. "Your turn, Miles Edgeworth."

"Very well. Um... Miss Fey. Truth or dare?"

"We haven't had a dare in a while, have we?" Maya asked, then rubbed her hands together. "Dare!"

Edgeworth looked surprised by this answer. "Very well. Ah... I dare you to prove the existence of spirit channeling! If I am correct, this should be impossible!"

Maya sighed, disappointed. "Really? What a boring dare." She looked over at Phoenix. "Who should I channel?"

The defense attorney shrugged. "I dunno. Any preference, Edgeworth?"

"Hm... It has to be someone who is a stranger to her. If Miss Fey knows the dead person, she could simply pretend to be them." Edgeworth paused, trying to think. "I dare you to channel the spirit of Mr. Deid Mann!"

"Dead Man? Who names a person that?" Maya laughed. "Okay. Mr. Unfortunately-Named coming right up!"

Before the group's eyes, Maya shifted form. She became a tall man with short black hair and a beard. The only features that didn't change were Maya's hair and clothes.

"...where am I?" The 'man' before them asked.

Phoenix was about to speak when Edgeworth silenced him. "Sir! Before I explain, please confirm your identity. What is your name?"

"My name is Deid Mann, sir. May I ask how I-"

"How do you spell that?"

"D-E-I-D space M-A-N-N. Why do you need to know?"

"There's no way Miss Fey could have known that," Edgeworth growled. "You truly have no idea where you are?"

"None, I assure you. What is this place?"

"Wright and Co. Law-"

"What are your most recent memories, Mr. Mann?"

"I was working in the Codophian embassy when I turned around. There was a man behind me. He had a gun. He fired one shot and..." the man reached up to scratch his hair. "That's all I can remember. Did I truly-"

"Th... thank you, Mr. Mann. You may leave Miss Fey's body, now." Miles Edgeworth was struggling to speak. "Go. Now."

"I'm... sorry? You'd like me to leave?" Mr. Mann pointed to the door.

"It doesn't work like that, actually," Phoenix explained. "Mia knew how to leave, being a medium and all. I think you have to wait for the channeling to wear off."

"You are correct, Mr. Phoenix Wright," Franziska shook her finger at Edgeworth. "I told you to accept this ridiculous phemonemon. I dealt with an entire case surrounding it. You took me for a fool, but look. Who is the fool now, Miles Edgeworth?"

"Ngooh!"

"Can someone please explain what's going on here!" Mr. Mann was terrified. Poor guy.

"Oh well," Phoenix sighed. "Guess we have to stop the game for a minute. I'll explain."

* * *

Once Maya's channeling session had ended (Edgeworth finally conceded that Maya had channeled a spirit), the group of five continued their game.

"It's getting kinda late," Phoenix noted, looking at an office clock. "How about... One last turn for all of us?"

"Works for me! I gotta remember to feed Missile tonight." Gumshoe laughed.

"Hey, wasn't it my turn?" Maya asked. "Edgeworth dared me, so... Nick! Truth or dare?"

Phoenix eyed her distrustfully. "Truth. I don't want to know what your dares might include."

"Darn it! Okay... Uh..." Maya clapped her hands together. "Oh! Did you ever have a crush on my sis?"

"What?! No!"

"Really?" she gave him a confused look. "You always seem so happy to see her."

"Because she saves my sorry hide in court every time she appears! I don't know what I'd have done without her."

"Mr Phoenix Wright, you rely on a dead woman to prove your cases?" Franziska tutted, shaking her finger. "Pathetic. Miss Maya Fey, I trust you know what to-"

"Ow! Seriously Maya, you whip harder than Von Karma!" Phoenix exclaimed, then clamped a hand over his mouth.

"Oh really?" The prosecutor challenged. "Should I interpret that as a dare?"

"No, wait. You were dared not to whip anybody, remember?" Phoenix protested even as Franziska reclaimed her whip.

Edgeworth paused in consideration. "Are there any rules about contradicting dares, Miss Fey?"

"Uh... I dunno. This is actually my second time playing. We don't have 'Truth or Dare ' in Kurain."

"Detective?"

"Oh yeah! We had them all the time at the police academy. You can dare whatever you want, pal!" Gumshoe answered without thinking. "Go ahead, Von Karma, sir!

"Gumshoe! Why would you- ow!" Phoenix recoiled. "That wasn't even a real dare!"

"Well, Mr. Phoenix Wright? Did I outperform Miss Maya Fey?" Franziska asked, whip ready to go a second time.

"If I say yes, will you- ow!" Phoenix took several steps back this time. "Yes. You are _definitely_ stronger than Maya."

"Hey!"

"And that still wasn't a real dare."

"Irrelevant," the blue haired woman handed her whip back to Maya. "It is my turn. Scruffy, answer the game's title question!"

"Me, pal? Uh... Truth, I guess." Gumshoe replied, eyebrows waggling.

"Fine. I will ask an irrelevant question for the sake of questionable entertainment. Are ramen noodles truly the only food you consume?"

"Well... I do have Mac and Cheese sometimes. And I found this really cheap noodle stand that makes all kind of-"

"Detective, are you really this malnourished?" Edgeworth interjected, shocked. "How are you still functioning?"

"Well, I am pretty sluggish sometimes. And I do get a bit dizzy before dinnertime, but-"

"This is unacceptable. I am convinced you would preform better at your job under a healthy diet. Your pay will be raised immediately."

"Really? Thanks, sir!" He beamed.

"Objection! You can't just raise a detective's pay without proper cause."

"Franziska.. How is the ability to eat not a proper cause? Detective Gumshoe is starving on government watch." Edgeworth glared at her. Franziska let out a huff, but remained silent.

Phoenix and Maya were amazed. The room was silent.

"Well... I guess it's my turn." Gumshoe scratched his head. "Maya?"

"Dare! You people are so boring!" Maya smirked. "What'cha got, Detective?"

"I dare you to... Um... Do the Macerana!" Gumshoe smiled.

"Okay!" Maya bounced out of her chair and began to dance, singing horribly off key.

"Really, Gumshoe?" Phoenix raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't know what else to do, pal!"

Maya finished, sitting back down in her spot on the couch. "Okay, who's left? Mr. Edgeworth, truth or dare?"

"The truth, Miss Fey. I live for it, after all."

"Cool! Uh...Since you found out about DL-6 and all, would you ever want to become a defense attorney? Nick said you wanted to as a kid. And if you did, you and Nick could even be partners!"

"Probably not. Though I did think about it while I was away." Edgeworth leaned back, "I realized that one can still be honest and seek the truth from the perspective of a prosecutor. When I came back, it was a simple matter to show everyone else."

"Huh. Okay!" Maya stood up, turning to face the readers. "That's it, folks!"

* * *

 **A/N's: I actually wrote this a long time ago. I posted this on ao3, but I just realized I never brought it over here. Whoops.**

 **But this was fun. I usually don't write for this era, but I liked it anyway. And yes, that is a Porky Pig reference. I have no shame.**


End file.
